One Town Over--Part One

If you haven't heard Jodee Blanco speak, be prepared--bring tissues. Both times I've heard her there wasn't a dry eye in the audience. Unlike many girls who experience a roller-coaster friendship and need strategies to survive the anxiety that comes with ups and downs, Jodee was the target of constant and horrifying bullying and harassment. She is now a public speaker and a successful actress. Her story of surviving (and thriving) is amazing and told in a way that really reaches inside you (the acting skills come in handy). If you can afford to hire her to speak at your school, do it. She's amazing!

(as an aside, the reviews on Amazon are very mixed.   I'm not sure why.  She is a little over the top and the book isn't particularly well written, but I thought her message was great).   

One of the messages that really stood out for me in Jodee's second book Please Stop Laughing at Us. is the concept of ONE TOWN OVER.




What this means is that by having a friend or alternative community ONE TOWN OVER, we can give our kids a chance to make friends away from the pressures of school. I have heard friends say that they were unpopular in school, but had lots of friends at camp or in their youth group. I know I wouldn't have survived my 6th grade bullying incident if it weren't for Lyn, my best friend that went to a different school and treated me as if I was completely normal (not as the loser I felt I was at school at that time).

Thanks Lyn!!!

I take this One Town Over Thing very seriously. The politics of school can be very intense and having other friends outside of that circle takes the pressure off as well as allowing you to be authentic in a different way without the pressures of school interfering.

I was lucky enough to connect with a woman named Jess who was in my birthing group. I instantly adored her and we have remained good friends. We both have girls that are about to turn four. Her family lives in the city. We live on an island. When Mira gets to see Pela, it's a different thing. She's her "special" friend. I have no idea in what ways this friendship will grow or what will happen in the future, but it's my hope that Pela will be one of her ONE TOWN OVER FRIENDS.

How can you create this for your child? Classes, youth groups, befriending people you meet at the park, meet up groups. It doesn't have to be expensive, but be on the lookout for great connections outside of your community.